Try not to worry about things you’ve no control over

Is there life on Mars? Whilst there may well be evidence of bacteria-like microbes on the Red Planet, it’s probably safe to say that we’re unlikely to be visited by H. G. Wellsian Martians any time soon.

But is there life elsewhere in the Universe? Many think there absolutely must be, though we’ve really no idea of its form.

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For a minute, let’s just imagine that there’s a planet called Zog, sitting in a solar system a little like our own, populated by Zoganoids who are approximately as advanced as us.

Now it’s pretty likely that some things on Zog went well yesterday, whilst others were not so positive. I’m sure that The Daily Zog – being like our own newspapers – will have generally focused on the latter, publishing all the bad news that’s fit to print.

My point is, you’ve no idea whether this is so, making it rather pointless to worry about events on Zog.

Now this is an extreme example, but closer to home it’s rather easy to become upset about news in the media which really doesn’t need to concern us.

I’m obviously not proposing that we should become dispassionate and self-centred, choosing to ignore famines, wars and repressive regimes, because part of what makes us human is our empathy for others.

But I do think it’s easy to slip into worrying out of all proportion about events over which we really have no influence.

Study a newspaper too closely when your mood is low, and you may well end up feeling worse.

Perhaps becoming overly affected by something going on at the other end of your country is only marginally less destructive than fretting about the state of the Zoggian economy?

7 thoughts on “Try not to worry about things you’ve no control over

  1. Thanks for sharing and I do agree that if their are things you absolutely have no control over, don’t spend you time worrying about them, instead, focus your energy and efforts on things you can do something about.

    May the SMILE be with you.

  2. Absolutely true. In fact, I found I had to stop reading the daily newspaper as it made me feel worse. I now just read a Saturday edition, but spend ages on things like the crossword and puzzles and the enjoyable sections.. My husband had always read a paper, a broadsheet, and I always found it harder as so many intellectual things didn’t appeal. He just advised me to read the things that interested me…so I do!

  3. My mum died three months ago, leaving an 85 year old father with very limited mobility and a great deal of grief. My mu had advanced dementia and had been cared for in a nursing home for 7 years. Yet my father visited obsessively every day to the point of exhaustion until my sister and I persuaded him to go slightly less. Now he is so angry and bitter and complains about all things. I made a mistake in thinking that trying to help him and make his life a bit easier he would feel better. But my husband ,quite rightly said, that grieving old people have to sort out their own issues. This weekend we took him to the country, cooked him lovely food and really looked after him. His response was an outburst of such vitriol and disagreeableness that it made me feel ill. My point here is that as much as you want to make things better for people, you really cannot. It maybe that he feels safe expressing all his angry grief with his daughter, but I am entitled to say no. I cannot change his age, his gammy knees or his wife’s death. I am entitled also to grieve myself for my poor old mum. Things I cannot fix or change. Old age and death visit us all and we are entitled to protect ourselves.

    1. I feel for you, my dad is in hospital with a stroke, prognosis, not great and my mum is trying to come to terms with it whilst being piled high with estate stuff and bills etc. Its a really tough time for her and everyone, I and my husband are trying to take as much on as we can to help and also visit dad on top of regular schedules, but have to be aware that making myself sick with exhaustion won’t help anyone out. Happily so far the grumps have been minimal, but sometimes surprising.

      1. oh, what I meant to finish off with is be gentle to your dad as you are doing, but make sure you are gentle with yourself too, you sound like you are doing a great job

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